The way things were.

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In the last month I’ve been making tiny steps into a different direction. I want to be more responsible and fall into routines. I rarely follow schedules and my life felt like a complete disarray these past two years so I’ve been craving some sort of order.

I joined a choir on Monday and am really excited to go to choir practice after work now. I geeked out and spent way too long at Muji agonizing over binders and I can’t wait to decorate it with stickers. This takes me back to when I was about nine years old and a complete neat freak. I cleaned and organized my room regularly and diligently followed a strict time table my mother would print out for me every week. I quickly grew to loathe that lifestyle to become the slob I’ve been for the past 16 years.

I get bored staring at the same face in the mirror everyday. I want to change lifestyles like I change clothes. Today I will be this and look like this until I grow tired of it. Then I will cut my fringe again and become someone else.

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